My mom comes into my room early one morning and says, "Maybe you should tell people you got laid off instead of telling them you got fired." It's not called getting laid off if you're the only one being asked to leave the company. I'm sticking with, "I got fired." It's more fun that way. "Mom, no. I got fired. It's fine. I didn't have the guts to leave myself, so getting fired was better for me anyway."
If I shared all the juicy details of what exactly happened, you'd be scrolling down this blog for 30 minutes. If you know me well enough, you know I got a lot to say and I'll never shut up. You don't have that much time, so let's get to the what's important.
WHAT TO DO AFTER YOU GET FIRED:
1. Never argue with the boss because you lose either way. If you argue and they let you stay, you'll end up continuing to work for a company that doesn't even want you there. Surely all the employees or at least a majority of them love you, but when you walk by the boss and look at her in the eye, it just gets uncomfortable. Not worth it. You lost your job. Get packing. But before you do.....
2. Tell all your coworkers you got fired. Yes, literally. I walked into each of the rooms in our office and made this statement, "Everyone, can I get your attention?" Everyone looks up excited that I may have scheduled another office field trip like I did the week before. I continue, "Today will be my last day. I was let go. I just want to let you guys know so you won't wonder where I am tomorrow." It actually felt good to see everyone's initial reaction. Some you could tell really felt for me and would miss me after I left. One felt guilty for something he probably told my boss about me. Another guy was happy I left. (All the people on his team hate working with him and the projects are coming along too slowly. He's getting fired soon too. I'll bet $100 on it.)
3. Go around and shake everyone's hand (everyone you've met before. If your company owns the entire 10 floors, don't go to every floor. Duh). Say thank you and tell them it was good working with them. Yes, I even did this to the girl who pulled rank on me and the guy who looked like he was happy I was leaving. Leave as the better person.
4. Proceed to the door with your box of belongings. (Yes, take everything. CD's and CD's and more CD's of all the work you did. You'll need it. Rumor has it that my coworker at the time brought in his entire computer and transfered the entire office drive to his personal computer!).
Walk with your head up and smile on your face. You're happy to be gone from a place headed by a person crazy enough to fire someone everyone at the firm loved.
My boss tells me,
"Everyone loves working with you, but this just isn't working. I'm sorry Brian. I'm sorry. I know you'll be a great architect someday." I knew I did nothing wrong, so I asked her to write a referal letter for my next boss. She says she doesn't write referal letters for anyone, but instead hands me a stack of her business cards and urges me to ask anyone to call her and she'll say good things about me blah blah blah.
5. Drive off into the sunset.
6. Go home and put together a new resume.
NOTE: Prior to getting fired, I read a book advising readers to always have an exit strategy. Know when you'll leave a firm and under what conditions. In situations where you get fired and the timing is unexpected, know ahead of time what you would do just in case. In my case, I rushed home printed 30 resumes and planned to head straight to 30 restaurants after dinner that night to apply for a position as bus boy or waiter. Don't worry about moving from Junior Architect to bus boy. It doesn't matter. You need money now and this job's just temporary. My parents have too much pride and they couldn't handle their son waiting on people (even though one of them slaved at one before). I ended up looking for another job at an architect's office and found one 4 weeks later.
If you haven't left your firm and you haven't been fired, plan your exit strategy today! Know precisely what you're going to do and how you're going to do it. Don't get surprised. Get a plan.
FRIENDS: This story was from 2 Decembers ago. I was not fired from my current job in Oakland. Things are going well....sort of.
